Love.

I was disillusioned. And I was “over” how things were going. The trajectory was inconsistent. The path was rocky for years. There were things I expected from our partnership (or didn’t expect but now realize that I should have). There were things I wanted, needed, deserved. But I still didn’t get. And I know he pretty much felt the same. Somewhere in between entering our 30s, parenthood, … Continue reading Love.

Feel.

Some say grief is the final act of love. I’ve heard others characterize it as “love with nowhere to go.” I’ve understood – and experienced – grief in both ways. I overstand now that grief is proof of life. Proof that love once lived and remains after a transition has taken place. You might not be able to actualize the love in the same way, … Continue reading Feel.

Losses.

As I sit up, awakened by my own mind at five-something in the morning, I think “I thought these days were over.” Progress still. At least it’s not three or four. No matter how many positive vibes and how much good energy I conjure, everything isn’t always going to be “that.” There has to be balance. Duality. Two sides to the coin. And no matter … Continue reading Losses.

Gratitude

grat·i·tude/ˈɡradəˌt(y)o͞od/nounthe quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. I had gotten to be quite spoiled. It’s a state of being I’m familiar with. As an only child, I’ve had my share of “not having to share,” ease, and everything being about me. Then the hard times came. And I got older. Old enough where I could make my own … Continue reading Gratitude